We all know once we push send it is too late, we can't unsend email.
We are now using the H&P strategy (Hope and Pray – the least successful strategy on the planet) that our message is going to be received the way we wanted it to.
What do we know happens automatically on the other end, because we do it too? That’s right our brains fill in the blanks and start-making stuff up that isn’t really on the page.
Are they mad at me? Do they think I am stupid? Why could they find a nicer way of saying that? You can add some of your favorites to this list.
So before you push send:
1. Check your state – are you in an empowering state or a negative state?
1.a. Change your state to an empowering one. POWER TIP below.
2. Is our original message congruent with your old state? (reread your message)
2.a. Rewrite the message from this new state, stay in the new state.
3. Now is this closer to what you really wanted to send?
You already know you can’t control the actions of the other person, but you do know you will be pushing at least one button on the other side and they are going to implement a behavior pattern good or bad.
Same old advice still holds true – slow down. When you rush you are reacting – your state is far from optimal, your message will reflect the amount of time spent on it and your state. Have you even considered the person on the other end?
Even though you may try to argue that your message is ok – you are defending your message because you are still in the same emotional state. Until you can effectively change states – you can’t even evaluate your message properly.
POWER TIP: So you don't have to Unsend Email - To quickly change your state – think about the person, think about all the nice things they have done for you, think about how happy you feel about those things. Realize that this person is just trying to be helpful in his or her own way. Think about their strengths and what they bring to the table. See their face in your mind and smile at them and see them smiling back at you.
Until next time, keep Discovering your Natural Abilities.
P.S. I look forward to your questions and comments about switching into powerful states and about not having to Unsend Email!!
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